Full list of quotes (Season 1)

EPISODE 1
Caggie: In Chelsea, the truth is more fabulous than fiction.

Francis: There's nothing more beautiful than a beautiful girl in fur.

Francis: She’s wearing a great outfit.
Frederick: It looks endangered.
Mark: High street fashion… is not allowed under any circumstances whatsoever!
Mark: Food? Chelsea girls don’t eat!
Fred: Hope’s a beautiful thing.
Spencer: I wouldn’t sleep with anyone other than my girlfriend... at the moment.
Fred: Totes, man. Totes.
Cheska: London just gets a bit too much. I get bored of pavements.
Rosie: I think fake tan is probably the most offensive thing in the world.
Ollie: I don’t want to go out on a Tuesday night, 'cos that just makes me sound like a sad weirdo.
Ollie: I’m a bit pissed off. My hair used to be exceptional and it’s going downhill, I feel.

EPISODE 2
Francis: He’s got a Brazilian… girlfriend.
Amber: We enter onto a lunch road and maybe progress on to the dinner highway.
Caggie: I think it sort of says lunch, dinner and probably breakfast as well.
Gabriella: I feel like I’m going to cry when I think about skiing.

EPISODE 3
Spencer: I’m so honest with everyone. Maybe it’s a downfall.
Caggie: I don’t think we should all be together when there are guns around.
Ollie: Are you trying to distract me with your voluptuous bosoms?
Socialite: Louboutins for the blind! I know they can’t see the red sole, but these are classic shoes.
Rosie: Have I told you I’m taking Noodle to a dog therapist?
Hugo: Nothing like the country air to bring out a sense of competition.
Francis: Business is the warfare of the modern age. And I’m a general.
Francis: Business is a jungle. But I love animals.
Hugo: Winner, winner, chicken dinner.
Rosie: Pretty offensive.
Socialite: When I first met you, with your attitude, I thought Oh Em Gee this is never going to work.
Socialite: It was obvs a success.
Francis: I mean, acronym, it was great.
Socialite: She’s in love with you. Totes.
Socialite: You’re the cutest, TBH.

EPISODE 4
Hugo: Have you seen her? She is outrageous. Six foot, huge… talent.
Spencer: Playing polo? Pretty rah!
Ollie: Bi best friend. It’s the cheap equivalent of the gay best friend.
Mark: I can do trash, I can do biker, I can do Valentino.
Agne: Is he some kind of royalty or like a prince?
Francis: I think most princes are a lot more understated than that.
Agne: What does he do?
Francis: Apparently he shops a lot.
Millie: What’s the worst thing you’ve ever put in your mouth?
Francis: People inform me that I’m setting trends. I read about it sometimes.

EPISODE 5
Fred: Take your passion, make it happen.
Francis: It’s all about taking her on a sort of a mental journey of suggestion.
Caggie: Chemistry’s a bitch.
Spencer: Fucking wish I had a pug.
Rebecca: Did you skateboard here?
Francis: Yeah, I thought it was a bit more understated than the Phantom.
Rebecca: Do you ever take it off any sweet jumps?
Francis: My family’s got a long history of chivalry… I think you’ve got to keep it alive, otherwise what would the world come to? People dogging in carparks.

EPISODE 6
Mark: You are not made for picking up dry cleaning.
Agne: You’re definitely very glamorous.
Mark: And so are you. The A-Team.
Binkie: Stick your bum out a bit… perk it! Perk it!
Binkie: Growl at me. Growl at me like a grizzly bear!
Binkie: Unleash the beast!
Agent: You can have an ear reduction.
Spencer: I genuinely look at you and crumble.
Fred: Nice! Tiger Woods of croquet, bro.
Francis: I have eyes and ears everywhere.
Amber: Prince Harry on my table. Watch out, Chelsy!
Rosie: I literally had him on a plate. And I put the plate on the floor.
Francis: Problems not solutions, that’s the way I live my life.
Binkie: Fish give birth through their mouths, don’t they?
Fred: Bros over Lithuanians.

EPISODE 7
Rosie: Payback’s a bitch.
Spencer: I initiated Plan B.
Spencer: Cheers to the plan!
Hugo: You look like James Bond who’s fallen out of a biscuit factory.
Mark: Le freak, c’est chic!
Francis: I really must take you out to lunch to thank you for taking it upon yourself to act as some sort of gossip vigilante.
Rosie: Francis, your mask looks like a knob on your face.
Hugo: Keep your head in the game, eyes on the prize.
Agne: I kind of forgive you, but I think I’m going to forget you as well.
Hugo: Have you seen Pretty Woman?
Millie: Well, unfortunately I’m not Julia Roberts… and I’m not a prostitute.
Francis: I’ve always been a big fan of my hands.
Ollie: Your vagina’s spent way too long on its own.
Hugo: So, Plan B. Basically Plan Blow-up-in-your-face.
Spencer: Plan Backfire.



EPISODE 8

Cheska: Is that a girl's jacket?
Ollie: Originally yes, but then I bought it and made it a man's jacket.
Cheska: How have you made it a man's jacket?
Ollie: By wearing it on a man.

Life coach: I wanted to find out from you if you have any person that you aspire to be like, a sort of icon.
Francis: David Cameron.
Life coach: You can just use that as a tool, basically, just think back to David Cameron.
Francis: What Would David Do.

Amber: I just saw the most tragic case of fashion police 911 alert. Leggings and kitten heels.

Amber: When I get to sort of 40 I quite happily picture myself wearing like cashmere and Tod's loafers and like a chic cape in camel. I will live in camel.

Francis: I can do magic. I do graffiti. And I'm really clever.

Caggie: I like this one. It goes with my outfit. I think that's how most people buy guitars.

Caggie: I've concluded that men are the problem. They should be avoided.

Ollie: I had a relationship recently-ish.
Matt: Was he horrible or was it just...
Ollie: Um. He had a vagina.

Cheska: I find it the biggest turn-on that he's shouting at me and telling me what to do.

Cheska: Let's face it, we're here for the men, not really the horses.
Binkie: Tight jodhpurs, large sticks.

Ollie: What an odd-looking bloke.

Millie: Wedges are perfect for divoting.

Spencer: If it was up to me, I wouldn't let you go.

Spencer: She means the world to me. It's always been her.

Hugo: Get out of here. Run. Woo!

Millie: How was it saying goodbye to Spencer.
Caggie: You saw it. It broke my heart.